So I went to another doctor today. Well actually just DR. Reese. He is one I my faves I think. We had a real heart to heart. I just kinda laid it out on the line for him.
Some things I learned:
He is willing to take out my gallbladder.
I could have another surgery.
I have about 1,000,000 decisions to make. And I feel kinda like I am stepping out in the dark on any of the decisions I decide to make. Then Heavenly Father gently guides me to more possibilities. I am kinda at the point when I just want him to come out and say, "Go here, Do this, and like it." And I would say, "Okay. That sounds pretty good." And I would do it. But for some reason, I am supposed to go through this nice little challenge. It's really stretching me to the limit. And I don't normally get stretched to the limit.
I am realizing that I am unable to deal with people as much as I have been able to in the past. This inablility to deal with pain really works with your mind. Kinda destroyes you slowly and softly. But I do small things to keep me sane. One of them is blogging. The other is food. I am finding that I have a deep passion for food. I am constantly reading books about food, cooking, nutrition, etc. Not that the whole nutrition thing is really sinking in deep, I still love pizza and an occasional Dr. Pepper to calm my nerves. But I love learning about it. I am also constantly reading books about organization. I can organize anything. That is one of my hobbies and abilities. But I have a very specific and logical way of doing things. You will understand once the organizational project is finished. For some, the middle stages are completely confusing, but for me, I understand them.
Anyways. I think I am going to go camping. In my backyard. Cause I want to. I want to light a fire in the fire ring. Cook tinfoil dinners and marshmellows with chocolate. Actually, lets skip the marshmellows and just head straight for the chocolate. Bring out the sweatshirt and the sweatpants and a sleeping bag. Set up a tent and then really enjoy life. And in the morning, enjoy a nice cup of tea or Pero or hot cocoa. Yes, I think I will do this.
Sorry for the craziness of my brain. Sometimes I come here to dump. Everything that is really unimportant or important, or my feelings. Okay, just a big dump area. Yes!
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4 comments:
girl, I am totally with you. why can't we have a plan laid out... with specific directions. I hate having to endure with out knowing what the end result is going to be. I am NOT at all patient. I am sorry life is throwing crappy stuff at you... crappy stuff sucks. I hate crappy stuff. It is stressful.
I am also with you about food. I am obsessed with the food network right now. crazy. ha ha ha. I call it my porn channel.
We are definitely going to have to get together this year:) YOu are a kindred spirit. I can tell!
xxoo
I love you Mikayla.....Hang In There! You are the BEST! Love, Cindy......I guess you just have to work through it.....that is what this time...life .... is all about.....hummmmmm.
I would have gone camping with you - sounds like fun! Hang in there, kiddo - you have lots of people cheering you on. Count your many blessings, put your shoulder to the wheel and do something good in the world today!
:o)
Miss Kay, you continually amaze me! I love how you are seeing through some of the enduring you are doing to the blessing contained therein...Sometimes our growing pains come so easily it seems we hardly notice them and others we feel every step of the way...I love your "dumps" keep it up! You write the way you speak and I love that! Not everyone can do that...it is a talent! Enjoy your camping trip!
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